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Considering Divorce? Answer These Questions First

No one marries with the intention getting a divorce, but many couples find themselves unable to resolve discord with their spouses, even after years of successful marriage. Like marriage, divorce is a big decision. If you believe that divorce may be in the best interest of you and your family, answer the following questions before calling it off with your spouse.

Am I looking for a divorce or a better relationship with my spouse?

If you feel trapped in an unhappy marriage, it may be difficult to tell if you want a divorce or simply a better relationship with your husband/wife. If resolving your differences and regaining a relationship with your spouse would make you happier, then divorce may not be the answer.

Do you and your spouse have a bad marriage or bad relationship skills?

Sometimes, marriage is simply a mistake. This is more common in rushed or arranged marriages. Not everyone is wise in their selection of a life-partner, which can cause, at best, a contentious relationship.

If, toward the beginning of your marriage, you and your spouse had a solid relationship, your marriage might not be the problem; you (and your spouse) may have poor conflict resolution and relationship skills. There is a difference between, "This marriage was a mistake," and "We don't know how to solve this problem in our marriage." If you and your spouse simply lack the relational skills to solve a given problem, seek professional help to determine if divorce is optimal.

What is my contribution to our problems?

Husbands and wives don't always hold 50% responsibility for marital difficulties. In most cases though, both spouses contributed something to the problem. Even the most argumentative partners aren't 100% guilty of strife in the relationship. Before you decide to dissolve your marriage, examine your contribution to the issue and identify behavioral changes that might help your relationship.

Did I seek sound, unbiased advice?

Like any decision, divorce shouldn't be a spur-of-the-moment decision. Make sure you talk to someone you can trust, someone who can help you understand the source of tension in your marriage so that you can determine the best path for your future and your family.

To learn more about your options through a divorce, speak with a lawyer from The Buxner Law Firm today. We offer free, in-office consultations.